Apr 13 2008
Contributors
Bi the way is actively seeking contributors to this weblog. If you have something to say on the issues raised or on related topics, then we want to hear from you. There are two ways you can contribute:
1) By posting comments – anyone can post comments on existing articles and pages, we welcome any comment that helps stimulate debate, shares an experience, offers support to others and/or provides new insights.
2) By publishing articles – If you can write clearly, articulately and with interesting inflexions then we would love to receive your articles. Initial submissions should be sent to editor[at]bitheway[dot]co[dot]uk and if we feel we can arrange a working partnership we will invite you to write a regular column and submit articles via our blogging software.
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10 Responses to “Contributors”
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Hi,
have you just started this blog? This seems really interesting and promising!
Who are you and what do you do, if I may ask?
I am a bi guy, not really out but not ashamed at all. 31, grad/med student in Cambridge MA. Pretty sexual and with a sexual past of “have had sex with more guys than girls but have had much more sex with girls than with guys”.
Exploring male bisexuality is really NEEDED. I ll be happy to help.
wrte me some lines on you, if you can. i ll be happy to exchange further.
A
Can I recommend a topic? I’d like to know how most bi guys feel about shemales? As in would they have sex with them, date one, ever desire to become one, ect.
Lately I’ve had a real attraction to shemales, some of them look really hot and I think part of my attraction stems from some inner desire to want to try it out myself, without really trying it out forever. I don’t think I ever would, but some of these ladyboys look just like women with the only difference being well.. you know.
I think part of my desire lately also stems from the fact that my current girlfriend is having vagina difficulties lately. Pain, bleeding, discomfort, that area can be really sensitive and even if we can be understanding as guys, it’s kind of depressing when you can’t get it because she either isn’t enjoying it or going through something at the moment.
Sorry to hear your girlfriend’s not well Michael, hope she gets well soon.
I think your feelings about transsexuals are perfectly healthy. I mean what guy wouldn’t want a pair of tits for the day? I’d never leave the house if I had a rack of my own.
Probably a bad idea to get a pair then. I’d never get any work done.
Seriously though, I think a lot of people would think that a pre-op (or no-op) M2F Transsexual would be on paper at least a bisexual man’s dream. The realities however, I suspect would be very different, female hormones don’t do much for the male libido.
What’s more we’re predisposed to talk about transsexuals in terms of “Shemales” and “Ladyboys” which is a result of conditioning by the porn industry, it leads us to rather selfishly assume that transsexualism is about sex when really its about gender.
In my rather limited real-world experience Transsexuals do not want to be identified as hemaphrodite sex-objects but instead are trying to gain acceptance as a member of the gender they self-identify with.
hi,
just want to second what several folks here have already shared, which is a big thank you, to you.
i am a 36 year old bisexual male living in the states a professional in the arts, and i have essentially lived a life of utter ups and downs of self confidence – that i know i am real, and self doubt – that i am not so sure my feeling are real, that perhaps i am another false bi statistic that most straight/gay people want to keep believing – that i get ground down under the endless pressure that one is only 100% gay or 100% straight. and bisexuality is: an amalgam of every negative stereotype, that we have all heard a million times.
it still amazes me that in this day and age that we live in, there is such a strong hold to cling to a binary mindset about most issues of the human experience. it is ultimately politics that require this kind of black/white either/or attitude, due to the fact that for so many years non-heterosexuals have had to assert that they in fact are real into the world – it could be argued that political movements require one-liner slogans that are definite and black/white(i simply frame how i can see that the fluid nature of a bisexual identity may be inconvenient within a political movement that is trying to assert its reality to the straight world. a straight world that is having a hard enough time grasping homosexuality, and perhaps can accept it if it becomes the same mainstreamed mirror of its own image – life in the burbs w/ marriage and kids perhaps).
but it amazes me how predictable the human condition is to want to repeat itself (the revolutionaries will become the next oppressors, and on and on). the fact that so much of, what i will call “main stream gay” culture is repeating the very cycle of; denial, rejection and suppression of bisexuality – that they themselves had to endure and break through.
i do believe the ‘sexual liberation’ civil rights movement, was about “SEXUAL LIBERATION” not conformity to yet another codified identity.
what makes it so incredibly painful, at times only, to be bisexual, is that there is always this sense deep down that maybe it is all false, because you are constantly seeking others who are like you. you are constantly looking for the image in the world to verify your experience, and it is simply not there. there are very few positive open male bisexual role models, which makes it tough. and as you blogged, you become tough and independent minded to survive.
sadly, male bisexuality as an identity has only been demonized in our pop culture, when in fact it has always been there from the beginning of humanity. it is a fact, as you point out that it has always been present in the animal kingdom as having had expressions in almost every culture within every continent throughout human civilization. sexuality never comes and goes, but the ‘fashions’ of sexuality go in and out of style from era to era.
i only carry on and hope that eventually there will be enough critical mass of people who are visible that it will truly appear that we are in fact real and present and prepared to help shift the attitudes of the day and help create a truly sexually liberated world.
thanks for your blog as it is helpful to me for sure. i live for these moments when i hear a motivated voice that sounds like me. i need that for my psychic health.
i would be interested in maybe contributing some more writing if you are interested. i will check back later in a few days and see if you would want to contact me about that.
with kind regards, christian
Hi bitheway
I’m also a 29 year old bi guy. I happen to be married to a woman who knows I’m bi and is supportive of it. Contrary to many perceptions (not around here I know, but generally) I am in fact totally bi and totally monogamous. I’m also not trying to “hide” by marrying straight to avoid the difficulties of being bi/gay. That’s all just by way of introduction.
The point of my comment is to thank you for your excellent reply to Michael. I think that people too quickly overlook that transsexualism isn’t really about sex at all, it really is an issue of gender and gender identity. I’m not transsexual, but know people who are and have been involved in conferences, etc. where the issue came up and this common misconception does a lot to hurt the transsexual movement for acceptance.
Anyway, just found the blog, happy to have some new reading material on a topic that means a lot to me. I’m also very happy to see that the author is so level headed and respectful.
Thanks.
Hi,
I am so pleased to have read this insightful lpiece of iterature on bisexuality. I think it is time that society as a whole recognises that there are variants to the sexuality continuum. As a blackman I feel that bisexuality is not iin the black community and I feel that it ought to as I don’t think that I am alone on this journey. If I may, I really would like to discuss this with others so that I could gain a better understanding on what motivates me to having a monogomous relationship with a woman but at the same time a desire for a man. I can be contacted if anyone is interested on whiteness123@hotmail.co.uk
Thanks for reading this blog and I hope to hear from you soon. Peter
Anyone in the UK see the Mirror article today from Matt Lucas about how he’d turn straight for Cheryl Cole and would love to have sex with her?
An article about closeted bisexuality within the gay community would be very interesting, we all it exists and that a lot of ‘gay’ men are actually bi but simply find it easier to identify as gay
Hi,
First of all what an excellent site, I have been looking for something like this for what seems for ever.
I am a 37 year old man. I tend to go through phases of wanting men which seem to pass. I do think that I am Bi, throughout the last 10 years I have come out twice to friends only to move to another area and forget that this ever happened. I have had sexual contact with men, whom I generally met through either the internet or gay bars. It tends to be that I initiate the sexual contact, perform on them and when I have finished, they generally leave without returning the favour.
The bsexuality in my life has led me to be very suicidal over a number of years, leaving me virtually bankrupt, under medication and psychiatric supervision on a couple of occasions.
I aim to get over this but being Bi does not help me meet women. As I want a relationship with women, I feel that I must be honest with them. But where do you find women who are easy dating and living with a Bi male? I intend to start mixing with Bi males again soon and hope that I will find a bi female that I am comfortable with.
Both are important to me, I want to be with both sexes.
Mike Wrote: “Where do you find women who are easy dating and living with a Bi male?”
Well I found one, but I suppose it helps that I’m monogamous. I can go both ways but I stay true to one person at a time.
Effectively I’m gender-agnostic, which is a fairly uncommon type of male bisexual. But it opens up a broad spectrum of possible relationships.
Its much harder to find accepting straight women who are happy to let you “go over the dark-side” from time to time. Bisexual women may be more accepting, but you will probably find just as many open minded straight women as like with men, very few women openly identify as bisexual.
bitheway,
You have a great site. It will take me some time to read through all the posts, but I look forward to it. I’m curious whether you’re still seeking contributors. If so, I’d be interesting in talking to you about being a regular contributor.
Cheers!